


Love shows in little ways

by orphan_account



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Accidental Outing, Alcohol, Bisexual Characters, Closeted Character, Exploration of sexuality, F/M, Heteronormativity, Implied homophobia, Lesbian Characters, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Nightmares, Nonbinary Character, Nudity, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past M/F - Freeform, Pregnancy, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Supportive characters, Swearing, Trans Male Character, Zukaang - Freeform, breaking up, supportive friends
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:00:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24854224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Aang just doesn't love Katara the way he should. But theres someone else out there for him, he just needs to find out who they are.
Relationships: Aang/Zuko (Avatar), aang/katara minor, mai/zuko (avatar) minor
Comments: 15
Kudos: 87





	1. The fight starts

**Author's Note:**

> short chapter sorry, just tryin ta get some basics down looool the next chapter will be muuch longer

Aang could tell you exactly when he realized he didn't love Katara, down to the very moment. Well, he still loved her in in a friendship kind of way, but he didn't _love her_ love her. It was Aangs twentieth birthday, and Katara wanted to surprise him in a special way. She decided since they had never been intimate together, now would be the best time.

While Sokka, Suki, Toph and Zuko all had homes, Katara and Aang technically didn't. Aang was a free spirit and refused to settle in one place and Katara was fine with that. It allowed her to see more of the world, now the war was over. But she secretly wished they had a nice house they could return to every once and a while.

The two of them had stayed at an inn in the fire nation on their way to Zuko's home on the younger man's birthday. Once they had checked in, the older woman quickly shoo'd Aang out of the room until her 'surprise' was ready. So he took a stroll through the small fire nation village to kill time.

It was a lovely place, Aang had to admit. All the locals would run up to him and thank him for ending the war, and Aang remained humble and kind. Though the attention was nice, it was a bit tiring at times. Once a couple hours had passed, Aang returned to the inn, excited as to what his girlfriend had in store for him. 'Perhaps it's an ice sculpture? Or a nice date?' He wasnt entirely sure what was in store for him. He excitedly jogged to his room and gave it a quick eccentric knock and waited. Of course only a moment later he heard a pleasent 'Come inside Aang' and he quickly opened the door.

Needless to say, Aang was flabbergasted.Waiting for him on the bed was Katara, completely nude and surrounded by nothing but candles.

"Well hello there! Care to join me?" the waterbender oozed, a sultry expression in her eyes.

"...Aren't you cold?" was all the airbender could say.

"...Huh?" 

The two of them stared at each other for amoment, and before the waterbender could say anything, Aang quickly shuffled to the desk to the right of the bed, took one of his cloaks and gently placed it over Katara's shoulders, effectively covering her nude body.

"Katara, if you wanted to bathe together all you had to do was ask!" he chucked, going to remove his own clothes. That wasuntil Katara spoke.

"Aang, cut it out."

"... Cut what out?" he questioned.

The waterbender was secretly fuming at this point. "You can't possibly think that's what I wanted." was all she said.

"...oh." 

_ oh _

The airbenders face turned redder than a beat, and his breathing became panicked.

"Katara!! W-w-what were you thinking?? This is.. this is wrong!" he breathed, picking his clothes back up and redressing.

"WHAT? Aang what are you even talking about!? I'm you're girlfriend!" She shouted, unable to keep her anger inside anymore. "This is what you do when you love someone!"

"But... but we're not even married!" Aang huffed, hoping to deter the fuming lass, but to no avail.

"Fine! Let's get married then!" She huffed back.

"Katara I-I can't!" 

"Why not!?"

"BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I LIKE YOU THAT WAY!"

Silence.

Aang stared at the floor as he heard Katara redress, grab her bag, and slam the door behind her.


	2. The talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaay! I hope this chapter is okay, i dont have a proof reader so if anyone wants to help me with that, just let me know!!

It took almost twenty minutes of sobbing before Aang could even bring himself to look for Katara. 'How could I say something so awful to her?' he wondered. Had he truly meant it? He wasn't sure.

Once he had left the inn, he realized the waterbender hand't taken Appa, so she couldn't have gotten very far. He scurried to the village, asking anyone he saw if they had seen an angry or upset water tribe woman. No one had seen her, except for an elderly man, who claimed to have seen her headed for the beach. 'Of course shes at the beach! Why didn't I think of that?'

As he walked down to the beach, Aang's head was racing. What was he going to say? How could he comfort his girlfriend without making himself uncomfortable? Once the beach was in sight, there was no doubt that Katara was there. All through the water, large ice spikes rose from the waves. She must be _furious_ with him, and he didn't blame her.

"Katara!!" He shouted, to make sure she was still there. He got his answer when a large spike rose from the water, twice the size as the others. "Katara, we need to talk!" he shouted again, too afraid to be too close to the water.

The waterbender resurfaced, her face in a tight brow. She slowly swam to the shore, stepped out of the water and sat down, with a silent invitation to join her. Aang treaded carefully towards her and sat down next to her. They sat in silence for a few minutes, and she broke down. It started out as a few sniffles, to crying, to full blown weeping, her hands covering her face so Aang couldn't see.At first the airbender kept his distance, but once the wailing started, he hugged her. He held her tight as she wailed into his shoulder, causing tears to run down his eyes. He was truly heartbroken for his girl, and it was all his fault.

After a while of both of them crying together, they parted and simply sat together, before Katara broke the silence.

"Did you meant it?" Aang knew exactly what she was talking about, and it broke his heart.

"I'm- I don't know." was what he could muster. "I do love you, Katara, but I can"t have sex with you."

"Why not?"

Damn, that was a good question. Why _didn't_ he want to have sex with Katara? He had no problem kissing her or bathing with her, but he'd never fantasized doing the do with her, not even a little. He knew of people who never had sex with their partners and they were very happy together, and he _did_ want to have sex.... but not with Katara.

"I don't know actually."

At this, she pulled away from Aang. "What do you _mean_ _?_ Don't you love me??" She questioned, her face red and tear stricken. "Of course I love you Katara! I just-"

"Just what Aang? How can you not want to be intimate with a person you.... love..."

She stopped, and stood up.

"I think I understand. I love Sokka, Dad and Gran Gran the same way. You see me as your family, don't you?" she asked, her breathing finally leveling out.

Aang had to think. Was that truly it? Did he see Katara as more of a mother than a girlfriend? "Katara, I DO love you, I'm just not sure if we can be intimate togethter, but I just can't explain it."

The waterbender sat back down, her expression somber "It sounds like you're really confused. I apologize. I should have talked to you about it before. I shouldn't have sprung it on you like that." she sighed. Aang was surprised by this. "Please don't apologize Katara! I just.. never thought be would have to be intimate to show each other that we love one another." Katara paused, and asked a question that made the airbenders heart stop.

"Who was you're first crush?"

Why was that important? He answered honestly. "My old friend Kuzon. Why?"

Katara inhaled, held it for a minute, and exhaled. "Aang, I don't think you like women the way you think you do."

"Huh?" was all he could say.

The waterbender turned to face him and took his hands in her own. "Aang, there are lots of different people in this world. People who like men, people who like women, and people who like both. Sokka likes women, Toph likes both and you like men, Aang." 

"Wait, Toph likes women??"

"Aang PLEASE pay attention. Would you consider having sex with someone of the same gender as you?"

The airbender wasn't sure. Would he? He never got to see Kuzon grow up, and he never thought of sex as a child. And he didn't want to have sex with any of his male friends, but that was a bit different. "I don't know actually."

"It's okay Aang, you don't have to know right away, but think about it." With that, Katara stood up, and walked back towards the village.

...And the airbender had a lot of thinking to do.


	3. The dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok, im struggling to make these longer lol. i do not know how yall write like 6000 word long chapters fr. kudos to yall
> 
> ps the dream is based off of a dream ive actually had so ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Aang wasn't sure how long he sat on the beach, but the sun was going down before he knew it. He figured it was time to leave, so he sat up and brushed the sand off himself. He miserably looked in the direction of the inn and sighs. 

As he walks, he thinks. Thinks about what Katara said to him. _Some people like men, women or both._ The way he grew up with the monks, and how much of the world he has seen in his 120 years of life, and he simply assumed most people liked both. He thought that _he_ had liked both. 'What was it that had me head over heels for Katara?' he though.

Well, what was there not to like? For starters, she was beautiful. He adores her long dark hair, and how the waterbender would let him run his fingers through it. He loves watching her bend, how in tune with the water she was. She had been an excellent teacher to him, with her positive attitude.Oh, and the way she was with animals! He remembered when Momo had gotten so sick he couldn't eat or drink, and how she took care of him for a whole month!

But by the time Aang reaches the inn, he realizes something- none if these quantities are exclusively found in women. And besides, it's not like he could have children with Katara without adopting. His own body could not give her what it needs for a child, therefore no reason to have sex anyways. Monk Gyatso once said he was called a _pandanka_ , but he had never heard the word again. 

The airbender wondered if he should have gone outside to sleep with Appa by the time he had reached their shared room. He carefully reached for the door, and opened it as slowly as he could. When he peaks into the room, its completely dark. Because of the walk in the night, his eyes are already adjusted, as he can make out the outline of a figure tucked into the bed. The nomad resists the urge to sigh as he realizes he'll be sleeping on the floor tonight. He silently undresses, and notices a pile of blankets and one pillow stacked on a nearby dresser, indicating it had been left by Katara. He then picks a spot by the door, settles down, and eventually passes out.

** - **

** Aang is sitting on the floor across from Toph. At first he doesn't recognize where he is. All he sees is the young girl in front of him. Shes about 15, wearing the same dress he first saw her in in the swamp. Its storming somewhere close, the wind rattling the windows and the rain spraying down. 'Oh, I'm in Ba Sing Se.' He thinks (or perhaps says out loud?) He can now see the brown and gold walls around him. Though with the storm outside, he feels as though the walls will come crashing down any minute. He turns back to Toph, and sees that she is now the age at which they first met. **

** "My my my twinkle toes, you're so old!" **

** Even though it's not terribly funny, the two of them are left in a fit of ugly laughter. Aang clutches his stomach as his laughs rake through his body, gasping for air he doesn't actually need. "And you don't look a day over ten!" He chuckles, slapping his hand on his knee. Toph roars with laughter, falling onto her back and rolling onto her front. They laugh and laugh for much too long until a strike of lighting leaves them silent. They wait for the thunder that never comes, and when the airbender looks at his friend, he sees only fear in her glossy eyes. **

** 'Run', her lips mouth, with no sound. **

**His blood runs cold as ice, and before he can react the house begins to shift. He's thrown to the floor, his head smacking the hardwood floor. The house shakes violently as it tilts, sending the two sliding across the floor and into the wall. Vases tip, pillars creak and split and the windows begin to shatter, the wind sending the rain into the home.**

**Aang looks to his left, spotting Toph pressed against the wall, shielding her dace from the elements. He tries to reach for her, but when he goes to move his arms, theres resistance. When he looks down, he realizes in horror that he's surrounded by water.**   
  


**The house is flooding, and Toph can't swim. The house continues to shift, tilt and warp until the water comes crashing down on them,the waves upon waves pinning them to the wall. Although he can't breath or see or move, the only thing Aang can think about is how Toph can't swim.**

**'She can't swim!! She's going to drown!! Katara!! Sokka! Someone save Toph! Please someone! She can't swim!'**

**-**

Aang wakes up in a cold sweat. He gasps for air as if he had really been submerged in water. He swiftly sits up, looking around for his drowning friend. When he sees a dark room and no water, he begins to calm down. "Oh spirits... that was horrific..." he gasps. He brings his hand up to wipe his face and realized his eyes are soaked with tears. He's not surprised in the slightest. It's the first nightmare he's had in about a year. Katara is good at keeping them away, and helping him through the aftermath. 'Too soon...' He thought. 

'Oh no, I hope I did't wake her!'

He carefully looks over to the bed, and is shocked to see it completely made up- and empty. He shoots up and begins looking around for her. He finds no trace of her or any of her things in the room and he begins to panic. 'She slipped out in the night??' He wondered. 'She couldn't have...' 

Then he sees it- A small folded up piece of paper laying on one of the pillows. He stumbles and flies across the room as fast as he can. Aang grabs the paper, swiftly unfolding it. It reads-

_My beloved,_

_I could not sleep after what we spoke about last night.To think that I am saddened and heartbroken over something that you cannot control- its bitter, and it's not fair to you. I've decided to go back to the South Pole to see Sokka, Suki, Dad, Gran Gran and Pakku. I'm not sure how long I'll be staying there, and I've decided to travel there alone. I need time to recover, and so do you. Just remember, you're number one in my heart, always._

_Love,_

_Katara_

_-_

Aang clutched the note in his fist. To think she was too ashamed to say goodbye in person, it broke him. He decided there was no reason to stay any longer. It was about dusk, so he quickly checked out and hopped on Appa, and headed straight for the Fire NationCapital. 


	4. The trip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaand here ya go

Aang spent the next three days utterly alone. Although he wasn't truly alone, because he had Appa with him. He loved the Sky Bison's company, now more than ever. Of course, he missed having someone to talk to, someone who wasn't a random person passing by. Since getting together with Katara after the War, they were always together. He couldn't think of a time he was away from her for even more than a few hours. They had spent a lot of time together, and the airbender hadn't felt this lonely in a long time.

The first day was the hardest. Most everyone knew of the Avatar's love interest, and anytime he stopped somewhere for Appa to rest, he was thoroughly questioned, interrogated even. "Why, it's the Avatar! Where is your companion?" they would say."Oh, the Avatar! Why are you traveling alone?" "The Avatar has graced us with his presence! But where's your girlfriend?"

This alone was going to drive him nuts for sure. As far as he was concerned, his love-life was his own business. And it was a sensitive topic, they had only JUST BROKEN UP FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

'Keep your cool Aang, it's not their fault' he reminded himself. Of course he'd need some kind of cover, he wasn't ready to tell anyone about their fight yet.

"Oh, she's just homesick and visiting her family!" 'Yeah, that's believable right?'

When he stopped for the night, in a pasture of horse-ducks, he was afraid to fall asleep. He knew the nightmares would come, but he was eventually to tired to keep fighting off sleep. 

**-**

**Aang is walking through the desert. At first he thinks he's alone, until he hears a voice next to him. "Great day for a walk, huh?" He turns and looks- it's Sokka. "Wish we could figure out where we're going though." Aang replies, wiping the sweat off his brow. The two of them continue to walk through the barren desert, and Aang breaks the silence first. "Sokka, do you think I'm gay?"**

**The question he wishes he could as the real Sokka, he thinks. The older man looks up from the sand, and simply smiles. "Definitely not what I thought you were going to say." he chuckles, stopping in his tracks. "Things like that don't matter!" the nonbender explains, throwing his hands in a dramatic fashion. Aang smiles, and looks ahead. 'Yeah, Sokka _would_ say something like that. It doesn't matter.'**

~~**Especially when nobody will ever love you.** ~~

**That.. wasn't even Sokka's voice.**

**The all too familiar voice sends a shiver down his spine, and before he lets the panic set it, he reminds himself: 'No expressions, no emotion.'**

**This is not a new nightmare. The airbender turns to Koh. "I really don't like you." Aang sighs, "You're not even real."**

~~**Oh, if I'm not real, then why the expressionless face my boy?** ~~

**Koh coos, wearing his friends face.**

**Aangs fingers twitch involuntarily. And Koh sees it. The nasty spirit lets out a hearty laugh. ~~Admit it boy! You're scared shitless of me. And I bet you're even more terrified of me now that I'm wearing the face of one of your loved ones~~~  
**

**The airbender didn't even respond. He simply turned and continued in the direction they had been heading.**

~~**Don't you dare walk away from me!!** ~~

**Koh charged with vigor through the sand, and Aang took off. He went to reach for his staff, but found it missing from his back. Running would have to suffice. But it seemed the faster he tried to run, the slower he would become. He could hear the manic laughter getting closer and closer until-**

_**Swipe!** _

**A searing pain struck him square in the back.**

**-**

Aang woke with a scream as he reached for the pain in his lower back. His hand touched the rough scarred patch, and he violently flinched. 'Damn phantom pains.' He carefully lifted himself off of Appa's side, realizing he had woke his friend. "Sorry bud, just a bad dream. Try to go back to sleep for me, okay?" he whispered, patting his large leg. Appa stared at him for a moment, yawns, and plops his head back down, already asleep before his head hits the ground. "Good boy."

-

The second day into his travel to Zuko, Aang misses all of his friends, not just Katara. He misses Toph and Sokka's crude humor, how they pick and prod at one another. He misses Momo, who now resides with Toph, though why the girl would want a pet that she can't always see was beyond everyone. He misses Zuko and Katara sitting on the sidelines, either talking about anything and everything or drinking tea in somber silence... "Oh spirits, what am I going to tell Zuko?? I can't tell him all the things I said to break Katara's heart, can I?" he asked allowed. Appa rummbled in return. At least someone was listening to him.

That night, Aang didn't sleep a wink, much too afraid of what his mind would come up with in the night. When he would catch himself dozing off, he would splash cold water on his face to keep himself alert and wide awake. When the water stops working, he decides to take a walk. He walks until his feet are limp and he can't stop yawning, the turns around and walks back to his temporary campsite. By the time he gets back, the sun is rising and Appa is wide awake.

They take off, their destination only a few hours away now. He manages to take a short nap on the way, too short of a sleep time to trigger any dreaming (Thank goodness) and he's no longer dead-beat tired. His heat leaps with joy once he spots Capital City. 'Finally!'

He descends straight into the city, landing as close as he can to the palace directly in the middle of the city. The airbender floats himself off of his animal companion, and finds two servants waiting for him. 

"Welcome Avatar Aang. Let us take your Sky Buffalo to the pens for you" The younger servant addresses, clearly nervous. He quickly decides not to correct her, and bows to her instead. "Thank you kind miss." he started. "I assume Lord Zuko is waiting for me inside?"

"Yes." The older woman deadpanned. Aang quicky shuffles past the two, unable to not hear the younger girl speak to the other. " Did you hear that? He called me miss! Eehee!" Aang throws open the doors, and steps inside the palace walls.


	5. The party pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaahhhhh!! ive decided to split this chapter into two since theyre so much drama going on here. part 2 will be coming soon!

Aang finally found his friend, who was in the throne room. As soon as he saw the Avatar, Zuko waved away the servants he had been talking to and smiled deeply. He enveloped the older man in a warm hug, and when he pulled back, Zuko spoke. 

"Aang, you look like hell! Are you alright? And Where's Katara?"

First of all, ouch. Second of all, what on Earth was he going to tell his friend??

"I-I.. Katara is.. um...she..." Aang sputtered, unsure of how to respond. Zuko noticed his friend's unsteadiness, and dismissed the rest of the servants in the room. Once everyone was gone, the Fire Lord sat his friend down on a nearby stoop. "Aang, did something happen to Katara?" he questioned. The airbender immediately began shaking his head. "Oh, no no no! Katara is fine! It's just... that..." Aang muttered, tears forming in his grey eyes. He reached for Zuko's hand, looking for comfort. The firebender took it, and spoke.

"... You two had a fight, didn't you?" At this, Aang began to quietly sob. "She's gone Zuko, and I drove her away!" he whimpered, resting his face upon his friend's shoulder pad. "It was all my fault, and I broke her heart. She left for the South Pole, and she's not coming back." 

Zuko began to feel a tish uncomfortable. Comforting was not his forte in the least, and he never did well with crying. He continued to hold Aang's hand, and decided not to say anything about his now soiled shoulder. He let the airbender cry himself out, knowing this was the first he was able to talk about the matter. Once the sobbing had subsided a bit, Zuko asked the big question. "Might I ask what happened? Or do you want to wait until after your birthday party to talk about it?"

Aang's breathing halted. "My birth...day..." Oh! He had honestly forgotten, what with all the drama and the nightmares, it had completely slipped his mind. He had also forgotten that former firebending teacher had a huge party planned, just for him. Too bad Katara had left, the Avatar really wanted her to be there with him.

"After, if that's alright with you."

-

The party was simply _enormous._ It seemed as though Zuko had invited the entire city to his party. Everyone who was anyone was there, and then some. Everywhere he went, he saw people he recognized from earlier visits to the city, and was constantly wished a happy birthday no matter where he turned. It helped the hurt in his chest immensely, and for a while the airbender was able to forget about Katara. 

Aang stood by the buffet table, stuffing face with cake, when a pair of callused hands roughly covered his eyes. "Guess who, fancy dancer!" A deep feminine voice spoke. "Toph!" He cried out, turning and immediately engulfing his friend into a platypus-bear hug. "You came!"

"Haha, yeah of course I came! By the way, where is Miss snooty pants? I can't find her footsteps anywhere!" Toph huffed, pulling away from Aang and blowing the bangs from her face.He was glad the woman in front of him couldn't see his face drop. "...Katara's not here. I'll tell you about it later. But right now, I have to ask you something." he pleaded.

"Sure! anything for my favorite student." she replies, a huge smile plastered on her face. Aang takes a quick look around to make sure no one is paying too much attention to them. "Toph... how do you know that you don't like men?" The earthbender swiftly places her hand over is mouth. " _Shhhhhhh_! Shut up Aang!" she bellows, causing a few eyes to dart in their direction. She grabs him by the arm in a tight hold and drags him until away from the party, into the palace and into an empty room. "Look Aang," she starts, taking her hand off his arm. 'That one is gonna leave a bruise' Aang thinks, rubbing his now sore bicep. "There are things you can't talk about in the earth kingdom, and who you love is one of them." 

"What do you mean?" Aang coaxes, unsure by her answer.

"Look twinkle toes, if word got out about my sexuality, it would reach my parents for sure. And the second they get wind of the fact that my chances of me having a child are lower that average, they'd cut me off for sure. I just got them back, and I'm not losing them again. Got it?"

Aang had no idea the talk of love was so taboo among earthbenders. "Got it."

"Now, what was the question again?"

"How do you know that you don't like men?" Aang repeated.

"Ah. Men. I think they're nasty." Toph replies, reaching up and taking a pick of her nose. "I was about 15 when I realized that I was a lesbian. But the Earth Kingdom is weird about lesbians and gay men, so it's usually not widely talked about. Does that answer your question?"

To be honest, Aang had _more_ questions now. "No, not exactly." he sighes, taking a seat where he's standing, resting his head in his hands. "What I mean is how do you _know_ that you're a lesbian? Aren't there men whom you've had even a little crush on?" the airbender wondered.

"Not really. My first and only crush was on one of my metal bending students." Toph took a second to take a seat next to the Avatar. "Her name was Helga. She cane from a small earthbending village from the south. She was tall and powerful," Toph swoons. " and boy could she metal bend! She was always my favorite student. But unfortunately she had to leave for home before I could tell her how I felt. A family emergency, I guess." 

'So some people just know how they feel then. Why is it so difficult for me then?' Aang thought, running a hand over his shaved head. 

"Does this have anything to do with Katara?"

Aang lets out a deep sigh before he resonds. "Yeah, it does. We broke up."

 _"What??_ But you two are _made_ for eachother!" Toph shouts. She stands up and stares at where Aang is sitting. "What the hell happened?"

Aang's not sure he wants to go into too much detail, so he keeps his answers short and sweet. "Because I don't want to have sex with her." The airbender waits for laughter that never comes. When he looks at Toph, She's staring at the floor with an unreadable expression upon her face. "Are... Are you gay Aang?"

He throws his hands in the air. "Well I THOUGHT I was bisexual, but apparently not!" He huffs, crossing arms as though he were still a child. He stands up and turns away from his friend. "I know I like men, and I though I liked women, but I don't want to have sex with them! But they're beautiful and strong and amazing. I'm so lost Toph, I'm so confused." It takes every once of strength he has to not cry. 'I can't break down. Not again.' he thinks, tears stinging his eyes. 

He feels a hand on his shoulder, and when he turns to his friend, all he sees is a look of guilt and pain. "Aang, I had no idea. I'm sorry you're so conflicted. You don't have to know right now, or tomorrow, or the next day. Things like this take time and patience, just like bending. You'll realize when you do. Tell you what, you're never going to figure it out in here. Let's head back to the party, shall we?" She holds her arm out, hinting at Aang to take it. He wipes his eyes and hiccups, taking her arm in his own, and walks back into the party.


	6. The party pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please... anyone who writes really good iroh plz teach me.... eeuehejhu  
> also.. feelings! finally!

When the two benders return to the party, it's in full bloom. People are drinking, dancing and singing to the orchestra. Though he could tell they were gone too long as everyone must have been drinking too much as they all seem to be singing different lyrics. It was terribly noisy and fun, just what Aang needs tonight. He leans in toward Toph's ear to make sure he could he heard. "Hey Toph, Where's Zuko?" he inquired, anxious to find his best friend. The earthbender sticks her finger in her mouth, and pulls it out with a _Plop!_ She then points to the far right of the ballroom and says "Aaaall the way in the back. I've been keeping tabs on him, hehe."

"Thank you Sifu Toph." Aang jokes, carefully grabbing her hand to lead her to Zuko. He knows she doesn't need much help navigating, but the act makes her blush anyways. They wip and weave through the booze reeking crowd, dodging anyone and everyone. "Heeeeey! It's Aang *hic*! Habby birthdey maan!" "Whooo! Birthday boy came back! Aang! Aang! Whoohoo!" "I love you Toph!" 

The earthbender quickly sticks her tongue in the direction of the last woo'er before Aang can see, and stomps the rest of their short walk. He spots his friend, his friend's uncle, and his friend's.... girlfriend? Aang wasn't sure of the exact nature of Mai and Zuko's relationship to be honest. While they both claimed to be boyfriend and girlfriend, they rarely spoke to one another. It was as if Mai had her own separate life. They never showed affection, and barely even looked at each other. 'To each their own, I suppose.'

Zuko sees the two bender and waves them over. "My friend is back, I'll speak with you guys later." Zuko states, smiling at three soldiers. They all bow and scurry of in the direction of the buffet. 

"Aang! ... Have you been crying?" Zuko inquires, his expression dropping. Iroh immediately gives the Fire Lord an elbow to the side. "Zuko! How much more subtle can you be, my nephew?" Both Iroh and Toph bark in laughter as Zuko turns a dark shade of red. Aang can't help but let out a chuckle at how embarrassed his friend is. "Hey now, it's alright! Don't tease Zuko, especially after he threw this huge party just for me!" Aang bellows, his laughter shining through. Zuko's face returns to its normal color, but gives Aang a worried glance. The airbender pretends not to see it as he speaks again.

"Anyone need a drink? Iroh? Zuko? Mai? I know you want one, Toph." his rambling cutting off Toph before she could speak up.

"I would love some tea, thank you Aang." Iroh responds. 

"Yeah, I defiantly need a drink." Zuko remaks.

"I can't." Mai deadpans.

Zuko shoots Mai a daring, sharp glance."What? No drinks for the lady?" the earthbender challenges. Now Zuko shoots the same glare at Toph, not that she can even see it. "Cut it out you two. Not here." the Fire Lord begs. Iroh gives a knowing nod, and Aang is utterly lost. He's even more lost when a grimace spreads across Mai's face. "Oh lord. I have to throw up again." Her hands are thrown to her mouth as she sprints to the nearest exit. "Looks like she wouldn't even be able to hold down a drink right now!" Toph exclaims, genuinely feeling bad for the girl.

"Is Mai sick? She looked a little green." Aang comments, staring at the now empty doorway. Iroh coughs into his hand, attracting the airbender's attention. "Mai _is_ sick, unfortunately. But I assure you, Aang, it is not contagious." 

'I hope she feels better.' Aang hums in acknowledgement, and turns to leave to get his family their drinks. He practically has to swim through the Sea of drunks, and it took forever to flag down a servant that still had any drinks left. Aang politely asks him if he can bring back some tea for General Iroh. "Sure thing birthday boy! And I'll bring you something sweet!" the servant exclaims, rushing off with his order. Aang returns to the group with a drink in each hand. He hands the first drink to Zuko, and turns to Toph. "Here ya go. Extra alcohol, just the way you like it." He chuckles.

"Aah, fiiiiinally!" She snatches the drink and begins to chug it. "Toph, please slow down!" Iroh pleads, not wanting the young girl to be _too_ drunk. "I would prefer if we all remembered this wonderful night!" Toph, Zuko and Aang all stare at the man. "Hey Zuko, let me have a taste of your drink." Aang says, reaching out a hand. The firebender chokes back a laugh as he hands the drink over. 

Toph has already finished her drink, and wipes the foam of her beer off of her upper lip. "That's the stuff." As Zuko sips his drink and Toph attempts to flag down anyone who will give her another drink, Iroh and the Avatar make small talk. 

"So, Aang. How does it feel to no longer be a teenager?" The elder firebender inquires, stroking his facial hair. "Honestly? Not that different." Aang replies. 'It's defiantly not going how I thought it was going to turn out...' he thinks. "Besides, I'm still older than you." Iroh chortles deeply. "Haha! I'm glad to see you haven't grown out of that sense of humor!" 

Mai and the servant before show up at the same time. Mai's brow is sweaty, and she's afraid her breath stinks of vomit. Iroh takes the tea from the man and bows. While Aang grabs his drink, Iroh passes the tea to Mai. "Here darling, for your sickness." The nonbender hesitantly takes the tea, muttering a simple 'thanks' under her breath. 

\---

"Man, you're friends can't hold their liquor for _shit._ "

Zuko wants to look away, but he can't. His eyes are glued on Aang and Toph, who are drunkenly attempting a ballroom dance together. Toph can't stop tripping over her own feet as the taller man swings her around and around, singing a tune that isn't even close to the music being played.

" _Ooooooooooooh_ what would ya do with a drunken sailor, what would you do with a drunken sailor, what would ya do wif a drunken sailor early in the moooooornin'~" Aang slurs, barely paying any attention to the girl he's currently dancing with. "Aang I *hic!* can't see whenya lift me off the ground!" If Zuko can remember correctly, the name of the song being played by the musicians is called 'La Suite Meurtriere'.

And the crowd. Around the two is basically the whole party, cheering and whooping them on. The utter insanity of it all. Zuko wants nothing more than to dig a hole, crawl into it, and die. He leans over to his uncle, who is amused none the less, and clapping to the beat of Aang's singing. "Next year, no alcohol."

At this rate, he was also going to to make sure Aang's next birthday wouldn't have music either. Zuko was getting a splitting headache. "If only your sister were here to enjoy this, nephew!" Iroh hollers over the noise. 'Too bad she's rotting in prison.' He almost says aloud. He turns back to his dancing friends. "At least Aang is in a better mood now. I can't stand watching him cry over Katara anymore." The younger firebender mutters. Before Iroh can reply, the two men spot Aang's regular server pass them, several drinks in hand. Zuko carefully pulls the servant back by the arm and sternly says "No. Aang's being cut off. No more drinks for him, and you may have the rest of the night off. Make sure the other servants know this." The man smiles widely, and nods. 

When Zuko looks back at his two friends, they're doing a completely different but utterly goofy dance. That is, until Aang spots him staring. "Zuuuuko! Dance with me!" the Avatar shouts, stopping in his tracks. The momentum brings Toph straight into him, effectively knocking both of them to the ground. A few onlookers rush to help the two drunken benders off of the ground, the two adults laughing and stumbling the whole time. Zuko does _not_ think it's such a good idea, but then he can hear the crowd chanting. "Dance, Zuko, Dance!" over and over. Once Aang is on his feet, he attempts to make a bee-line towards his best friend. 'Oh spirits help me.' The fire bender thinks.

When he looks at his uncle for help, the older man laughs and nudges him toward the airbender. "Nephew. How can you not want to dance? It is a party after all!" Iroh chuckles. Aang finally makes it to Zuko, and wraps his body around the firebender's left arm. "Pleeeeeease Zuko? We haven't danced in forever!" Toph takes this moment to snatch a drink from an onlooker, down it, and disappear into the crowd. As reluctant as he was, Zuko couldn't say no? "Alright, but only one dance." The crown went nuts. 

Zuko steadies Aang, and leads him to the center of the crowd. He nods to the orchestra to begin, and the music starts. What Zuko is not expecting is the slow dance music that begins playing. Aang quickly puts one hand on the Fire Lord's right hip, and intertwines their hands together with the other. They're both sweating, but for different reasons. 

"Isn't this nice?" the airbender asks, as they attempt a sort of waltz together. Zuko holds Aang tight so he doesn't stumble as much, and the Avatar leans his head on the firebender's shoulder. "It is." Zuko replies, and he means it. He's actually having a great time, and he forgets about everyone else in the room. Zuko pretends it's just the two of them, dancing in the courtyard on a cool Summer day. He imagines the sun on his skin, while waltzing with Aang. But it doesn't last long. He notices that the music has since changed, and now everybody is dancing and doing their own things again.

Aang pulls his head up and looks at Zuko. "Aww, our song's over. Do you want to keep dan-"

"Yes." the Fire Lord interrupts. He promises to himself that whenever the airbender wants to dance, he'll dance with him. Anything to keep the man close to him.


	7. The secret

The first thing Aang feels when he awakes is heat. He feels overly warm and sweaty, but comfortable nonetheless. The second thing he feels is a sharp pain in his head. 'Oh my spirits, what the hell happened to my head??' he begins to think, then he remembers the party. 'So this is a hangover. Huh'

Aang doesn't move for a good long time. He simply lies there, his head racked with pain. He lets out a long groan, realizing he should get up soon.

"Good morning."

If it weren't for his splitting headache, Aang would have shot ten feet in the air from surprise. He finally opens his eyes to see Mai sitting in front of the table on the opposite side of the room. She's sipping tea and writing something, what it is he doesn't know. "How long have you been sitting there? You scared the crap out of me." Aang groans, his voice raspy and low.

"Almost an hour. Don't worry, I wasn't watching you sleep." Mai replies, not taking her eyes off her paper. "Do you need some tea?" she asks in her monotone voice. 

Aang finally looks around the room, and realizes it's not any of the guest rooms. He's been in there enough times to know it belongs to Zuko. But why was he here?

"I'd love a cup."

-

Aang had managed to somehow roll out of bed to join Mai. They sat in silence as Mai finished her writing. He was afraid if he spoke while she was working, she would scold him. She wrote quickly and efficiently, and once she was finished, Aang spoke. "What happened last night? I can only remember bits and pieces." "Well what _do_ you remember?"

Aang had to focus, which was difficult considering the ache in his head. He remembered.... arriving. He also remembered talking to Toph about something, something about how she thinks men are nasty. And he remembers his first few drinks, but everything after that is a blur. "I can remember you getting ill."he groans. Mai flinches. 

Even though Aang and Mai were probably the two that spoke the least, he was genuinely worried. "Are you seriously sick?" Of course the best healer had taken off back to the South Pole, when she was obviously needed here.

"I'm not sick, I'm pregnant." 

Of course she manages to say this as Aang is sipping his tea, as he promptly sprays it from his mouth. It throws him into a brief coughing fit.

" _What?"_ he manages to squeak out. "Since when? We- I mean, _I_ was only here a month ago!" 

"Yeah, I was pregnant then too."

Aang is shocked to say the least. "...Does Zuko know?"

"Yes. He's been very protective of me lately. He almost didn't let me go to the party." she mutters. 

"And how did he react? Was he scared or excited about having a child?" Aang asks. He watches her, and her face sinks. 

".... I suppose you don't know the truth, do you?"

'The truth? What's that supposed to mean?' the Avatar thinks, sipping his hot tea. Mai waits for him to finish before she speaks, not wanting a repeat of the spray fest. "It's not his baby." 

Aang is utterly flabbergasted. Weren't they a couple? "Wh-what do you mean. Don't tell me... you cheated on him?" He doesn't want to offend Mai, but he needs to know.

"That's were the truth comes in. Zuko and I aren't actually dating." Mai deadpans. 

"...Huh? But.. but I thought.." the airbender stutters.

"Yeah, that's what we want everybody to believe. It's intentional." Aang thought... well he didn't know what to think. How could he not have known? Zuko wouldn't have kept this from him, would he? He couldn't help but feel as though he had somehow been lied to, but he wanted to know why. "Why do you guys want everyone to think your'e dating? What's the point?"

"I'm afraid I'm not the one to tell you. You should ask Zuko." Mai responds. 

"Okay." Aang stangs up from his spot across from Mai. "Where is he then?"

"He's currently in a meeting. That's why he asked me to be here, just in case you woke up before he was finished."

"Why is he in a meeting so early?" the airbender inquired. "It's like three o'clock Aang." Mai replies. Aang looks out the window and realizes she's right, it's much later than he thought it was. So he sits back down, and waits for Zuko to be done.

-

When Zuko finally releases everyone from the council meeting, he's exhausted. He had spent a majority of the night at the party, and afterwards he had taken care of Aang while Mai and Iroh took care of Toph. He was worried for his friends, knowing they'd have massive hangovers. And while Aang was _supposed_ to be at this meeting, after he explained how sick the Avatar was going to be, everyone let it slide. It was his birthday party, after all.

Zuko made his way down the long hallways towards his personal quarters, and wondered if Aang was even awake yet. He got his answer when he reached the doorway and say Mai and Aang both sitting at his table.

"Hey guys." Zuko spoke, keeping his voice quieter than necessary. "It's okay Zuko, my headache is nearly gone." Aang laughs, standing up and walking over to his friend. He pulls the firebender into an embrace. "Mai told me how you took care of me last night. Thank you." When he pulls away, Zuko notices Mai mouthing the words _You two need to talk_. 'Uh oh' Zuko thinks. Mai stands up and walks to the door. "I'll leave you two alone now. I have places to be." she mutters as she leaves.

The two benders sit on the side of Zuko's massive bed, and they both speak at the same time.

"So what happened with Katara?"

"Mai told me why she's so sick."

"Huh?" they both say at the same time. They just look at each other and bust out in laughter. "Okay okay, you first." Aang chuckles. "So... Katara." Zuko finally says.

"Oh." Aang had momentarily forgotten about her. His face shifts into pain as he reaches for the note Katara left for him and hands it to Zuko. He carefully reads it, then hands it back to the airbender. 

"What does she mean by ' _something that you cannot control'_?" Zuko inquires, genuinely curious. The avatar's breath hitches as he wonders. 'Is it okay to tell him? After what Toph told me, there are people who aren't okay with people being gay! What if...' his thoughts trail off. Why was he so afraid to tell his best friend? Was it fear of rejection? Most likely it was.

" Zuko, what's your homeland's opinion on homosexuality? "

Zuko broke out into a cold sweat. "It depends on who you ask to be truthful."

"I see. Well, what's _your_ opinion on it...?" Aang asks, looking straight at Zuko. His eyes bore into him in an unsettling way. The firebender had never seen his like this before. Despite Aang's cold exterior, he could smell the fear radiating off his friend.

"It doesn't matter to me. Love is love, ya'know?" At this, the Avatar let out a deep breath that he hadn't realized he had been holding. "Oh thank the spirits." he exclaimed. And Zuko was dumbfounded. "...You didn't actually think I was homophobic did you?" he prods, his expression sour. Aang puts his hands up in a defensive manner. "No no! Not one bit!" he yelps. "I was just prepared for the worst."

Zuko can't blame him, honestly. He was only out to his uncle and Mai. And he planned to keep it that way. 

"So..... Mai and I talked." Aang starts.

' _Shit!'_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cliffhanger!! sorry yall, but i wanna post this and i cant think of anything else to add rn


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